“The Date” – Before vs. After Kids

Once you have children your “marital dating life” is over.  Until the kids are old enough to look after themselves, there are no more impromptu lunch dates, no more “hey, wanna meet me for coffee in between meetings?”, none of that.  Unless, of course, you are lucky enough to have “Granny” live close by, have a live-in nanny or want to pay out the wazoo for a babysitter.  The closest grandparents live 1,429 miles away, we don’t have a nanny, nor do I want to pay for a baby sitter every time I fancy a Starbucks-fix or Sushi lunch with the Hubster.  In other words, the number of dates that we get to go on is very limited.

A date…

When you don’t have kids, it is can be impromptu, happen frequently and span anywhere from 30 minutes to an entire day.

Once you have kids, that’s a different story – one that might be challenging to comprehend if you are without lil’ones.  It is an event that comes with great anticipation.  In our case, it is something we both look forward to, almost like two little kids in anticipation of Christmas morning.  We get giddy, we talk about where we want to go, what we want to do, what we want to eat (duh) and how lovely it will be to finally have a chance to spend some time together-together.  When you have children, you know what I am talking about, how amazing it is to go out with your other half and have some “you-time”.  Just the two of you.  No lil’ones.  No running after them.  No snacks, water bottles, potty breaks and loud obnoxious toys.  You know, a date like you used to have, when you first started dating.  That kind of date.  Remember those?

This week was one of those weeks for us.  We had a chance to go on a MEGA-date yesterday: an afternoon and dinner date. We spent the week talking about it in anticipation, we were on cloud 9 that we were going, it almost felt like a “first date” all over again.  The whole week we’d been looking forward to it and the first thing I thought when I woke up in the morning was: “Today is THE DAY!”  We were going to spend the afternoon at The Grove.  Window shop (and possibly shop), have a coffee, sit by the fountain, listen to the live music, browse through Barnes and Noble (oh yeah!!) and just spend time together.  “Spending Time Together”, it’s a truly genius concept!  Then, for dinner we would go to this little French restaurant in “The Original Farmers Market”, called Monsieur Marcel.  They do AMAZING cheese fondue, serve delicious wines AND they have a French deli with fine wines, cheeses and tons of other deliciousness right next door. That definitely makes it a “Place in Heaven to the Power of 10″.

The babysitting arrangement was a barter, but I had offered to make a scrumptious lunch for our friend prior to us leaving her with the 2 little rascals.  I am cooking away, making a Spinach Salad with Warm Bacon Dressing, served with Olive Cheese Bread for lunch.  30 Minutes prior to serving.  Phone rings.  Babysitter sick.

Date off. ;-(

Lunch anyone?

Turns out that our lovely neighbor Clarissa was up for making mud pies with the boys after her two hour hike in the Canyon (brave woman), so minus a few hours we still got a date in.

We got to shop  a bit, wandered around, browsed and I pointed out Mother’s Day, Birthday and Christmas (they’re all coming up, ya’know!) ideas to Hubby.  I could spend days at Crate and Barrel and Sur la Table, quelle surprise… :-0  We had a coffee at Starbucks, skipped the book & magazine browsing only to move on to Monsieur Marcel.  Yummy-ness, here we come!

And the eagle had landed.

This is pure bliss for me.  Cheeses, wines, patés, home made preserves, and olives…

The barrels continued on the other side of the rack…

And olive oils…oh, someone hold on to my wallet, ’cause I should NOT be allowed to carry one on me right about now!!  Even though we didn’t have the evening to sit down and enjoy some of the best cheese fondue in town, we did manage to purchase ourselves the ingredients for a romantic and delicious dinner at home.

Fresh cheeses, freshly baked baguette, a beautiful bottle of wine, candles and … My Man.



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Published on: March 25, 2012 | Tags: ,

2 Responses to “The Date” – Before vs. After Kids

  1. Jadah S. says:

    Love this! Yes, dates are not the same with kids. We barter/swap for date nights too. We have even gone to Target on a date night. Not romantic, but being able to hold hands, browse and talk is so nice– even if it’s in Target. But a bread, wine and cheese date night “in” sounds so nice and very easy to do. That kind of night you just have to commit to after the little ones are asleep.

    • Marieke says:

      Oh yeah, Target runs sans kids can be such a welcome treat. (If you had told me this prior to kids, I would have declared you out-of-your-mind though ;-) We actually used to do a special dinner once a week after the kids went down and are less consistent with it now, though it definitely is a good idea to bring it back :-) As you said, it’s about commitment. So true.

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